Comments on: Women Should Buy Their Own Engagement Ring

By: Bryan

Bryan — Mon, 08 Mar 2010 16:50:58 +0000

I like the idea that I’ll buy the engagement ring if she (assuming she is also in similarly placed career postion) a big screen TV.

By: JannyPi

JannyPi — Fri, 12 Feb 2010 17:04:25 +0000

Shoot, I was waiting for the happy ending to the article! The comments are disturbing though, especially the attacks. Kyle, you presented a perspective that I hadn’t thought of and I was interested in why a woman should buy her own engagement ring.
To me, an engagement ring is a symbol of the commitment that a man has for his intended. It doesn’t have to be a massive diamond or really expensive because it is a SYMBOL.
I think it’s up to the couple to decide if a ring is important, and, if it is, then to choose something affordable. I think it’s okay for the woman to chip in for the ring, but don’t think it’s anyone’s business who paid for it. I would hate to think that someone is delaying asking for your hand because they can’t afford a ring. I know that if my intended suggested that I buy my own ring, I would be put off.
To love someone is to not keep the scorecard and the spreadsheet anymore and to know that you are a TEAM.

By: kathy

kathy — Wed, 10 Feb 2010 12:55:17 +0000

Here is my take on this:

The man buys what he can afford…….If that does not make the girl happy, he should look again at who he is planning on marrying, The whole point of marriage is love and compramise…..If ya want more t han he can give contribute to it, but even if you earn more money than he, I feel like some are a bit controlling with this. I have been married twice, both times small diamond……..It was of no concern of mine…..as I was wearing a sign of my mans love for me, had only to do with I loved him as well. I am married 27 years now, in the grand scheme of things, engagment rings mean LOVE and COMMITMENT….!

By: Kyle

Kyle — Mon, 08 Feb 2010 22:03:11 +0000

L. Hill, none of it concerned me. It didn’t make any sense.

By: L. Hill

L. Hill — Mon, 08 Feb 2010 15:48:15 +0000

That is your response Kyle? Of course you completely skipped over all of the parts that concerned you.

By: RingShopper

RingShopper — Mon, 08 Feb 2010 03:26:59 +0000

Women should buy their own engagement ring to be sure to get the one they love.

By: Kyle

Kyle — Fri, 05 Feb 2010 21:08:30 +0000

Congratulations for winning the “missing the point” award, L. Hill. Who are you to tell Amber she is cheating herself by proposing to her boyfriend? You seem very closed-minded.

By: L. Hill

L. Hill — Fri, 05 Feb 2010 17:59:05 +0000

Amber, if you have to propose to your boyfriend to get him to marry you then you are doing nothing but cheating yourself. If he wants to marry you, honey, he will. You said it yourself, you would love to have an engagement ring but it isn’t necessary-it sounds like you are far too versed in cheating yourself.

@ Kyle

Kyle, why are you so hung up on cost? The ring is a symbol of your love and does not have to be super expensive as many people have told you. I myself want a nice ring but I would not want my guy to break the bank to get it. I would gladly settle for an upgrade after years of marriage and financial gain. What make you think all women need a huge rock? I can’t help but feel all warm and fuzzy when a friend of mine proudly shows off her little “chip” of a ring from the man she loves. To see these women beam at the site of their ring-big or small-is always a pleasure. If you want a girl that isn’t about pomp and circumstance, that is a achievable but don’t act like you are too above showing your love with a gift. You sound very selfish.

I agree with you on not needing to spend tons of money, but when you say things like “but real men do not buy love or fidelity: they demand it,” you know that you are very far off from being in a real, loving, take no prisoners, selfless love. Love, like money, is EARNED. If you are anywhere near as stingy with your wallet as you are with your heart you will find that being alone is by far the most expensive debt.

You also seem to not hold women in very high esteem. Insisting that we are all shallow and materialistic when you are the one who is obsessed with things and money. Can you honestly say that when you meet and form a bond with the woman of your dreams and she wants an engagement ring you won’t buy her one? Why not? If anyone is brainwashed by societal demands it is you. Although you want women to pony up and cast down traditional roles you seem to think that you are quite some alpha-male and very reluctant to change views of how YOU AS A MAN should conduct himself in a relationship; if you aren’t then why the decree about what “real men” do?

In your article about paying for dates and in this one you are so ready to cast off women for the slightest thing that does not cater to you. You think women are expendable when in fact it is selfish men like you that are a dime a dozen. Everything you have said is about “me, me, and me.”

What are you trying to prove?

By: Amber

Amber — Sat, 30 Jan 2010 21:42:27 +0000

I am considering proposing to my boyfriend, and I am not expecting anything in return. If he wants to buy me a ring, he can, if not, then we will just get one for the wedding band. I am not concerned with rings. I just want to be with him. Don’t get me wrong, I am a female, and I would love to have an engagement ring, but it is not top priority for me, and I don’t think its absolutely necessary.

Also, for dates, my boyfriend and I are always fighting about who is going to pay (we both always try.) I think it should be a 50-50 deal. You are BOTH in the RELATIONSHIP, and in relationships, nothing is ever one-sided. We not me!!

By: Kyle

Kyle — Fri, 15 Jan 2010 23:27:54 +0000

Okay Robin, so then why don’t you buy your man anything even 1/10th as expensive to show that you appreciate him? You won’t, of course… It has nothing to do with price, money, or being cheap. It has to do with self-respect and a silly double-standard.