6 Tips for Sharing Financial Responsibilities

For many in relationships, money is often the hardest subject to discuss. Money matters are often the downfall of friendships and family relationships too. If you plan to share a life with someone (married or not), financial discussions should be a part of regular life or the consequences you face may not be pretty.

Whether you have been in a relationship for a lot of years or you are just starting out, here are a few tips for working together concerning financial matters:

Commit To Co-Managing

Most often, one half of a couple is ultimately the one who handles most financial matters. From paying bills to auditing the checkbook, the money manager usually shoulders the bulk of the burden with or without meaning to take on the job alone. Managing the household funds should be a shared responsibility just as any other household job. In fact, it is one of the most important household duties and equal partnerships should be made from the get-go. Couples need to seriously commit to doing their own share of the work each month so both parties know exactly where they stand financially.

Leave Your Judgments at the Door

One of the main reasons why financial discussions go no where fast is because the tendency for couples to place blame on each other for financial mistakes. If you are serious about being committed to co-managing finances, be just as serious about staying open-minded and flexible. This is especially important during the first discussion where tempers can flair rather quickly.

Review The Situation

Gather all the bills, statements, receipts, and any other financial paperwork together. This step is especially important, especially if either party is reluctant to reveal secret spending or expenses. The only way to work together is to come clean and focus on a positive outcome. Make lists of all outstanding debt balances and monthly payment amounts and compare that with income statements. The system for paying monthly bills and eliminating debts may be running smoothly already but a total review of the situation between both parties is still important.

Work On A Plan

Chances are good that if you weren’t discussing money for long periods of time, neither party has a true appreciation for each other’s financial goals. Discuss short and long terms goals of each other’s financial outlook. List everything from savings goals to dream vacations then list ways to achieve those goals. Focus on a solid budget and a better savings plan.

Commit To Regular Meetings

Once a month reviews of financials will likely not be as intense as the first discussion but are necessary to stay on track. Sit down together to pay the bills and discuss goals and achievements at least monthly.

Use A Mediator

If the money discussion hasn’t happened yet because of fear from either party, consider asking a relatively unbiased person to act as a mediator and help keep positive communication going forward. If one half of the couple has some spending secrets, moral support may be necessary. Only involve those you trust who can help you agree to better financial planning and discussions in the future.

Celebrate Yourselves

It may have been a tough meeting for both of you but it certainly is cause for celebration. Go out to dinner, take a long walk, or do something fun to celebrate why you are a couple as well as your commitment to better, stronger finances in the future. For one night, don’t worry too much about the budget. Focus on strengthen your bond with each other.